If you didn't grow up in the UK, or did not grow up in the 1970s (or heaven forbid, did neither), it is almost a certainty that you didn't read Grimble. In fact, even if you did grow up in the UK in the 1970s you probably wouldn't have read Grimble. But I did, and I loved it. I loved Grimble's food related exploits (such as playing football with a coconut, knocking some paint off a door, and sticking it back on with banana sludge). I loved the fact that Grimble had a friend called David Sebastian-Waghorn, who owned a book called “How To Make Fudge, And Other Good Tricks” (which was the inspiration for Indigo's latest set of pictures). In fact, I loved it so much that I wrote to Mr Clement Freud, its author (hairy ex MP, cookery writer and witty “raconteur”, grandson of Sigmund, brother of Lucian, and father of Emma) to tell him so. Much to the surprise of an 8 year old me, he (or rather Grimble, his character) wrote back to confirm that Clement wouldn't be writing any more books on account of his “teeth falling out, and being a Parliament or something”. It made a big impression on me. I was quite disappointed when I finally saw Mr Freud on television, a lugubrious character with big droopy eyes who would witter witticisms in a dismal, mumbly sort of way. Funnily enough, I quite like him now.
Anyway, it turns out that someone has gone and transcribed the complete
If you grew up in the UK during the 1970s, you might remember this…
Regular readers of Kittenhead will be aware that we have had, until very recently, three cats: Lazslo, Moko and Bam. Devoted Kittenhead readers will also be aware that Lazslo vanished without trace last month, and is presumed to be no more (or at least, not coming back).
We have grieved, as is common when a loved pet passes on, but the odd thing is that the Moko and Bam also appear to have been grieving. For the first few nights, they would sit forlornly by the door waiting for their brother to return. Lately Moko has started wandering around the house in the middle of the night, Mrowling loudly and pathetically. Last night, we could bear it no longer. After several attempts at fussing over her and giving lots of affection had failed to quash the mrowling, I shut her in the conservatory for the night. I felt a little guilty about this, as it was her birthday the next day (and deep down, I'm sure cats keep a track of how many times they've revolved around the sun, and believe this to be Deeply Significant). So, the next morning, I retrieved her from the conservatory, gave her big cuddles, a bowl of delicious cat food, and then let her out to run around in the garden.
Fast forward to 8.30, and I leave for work. At the corner of the road, is a freshly squashed spotted ginger tabby and my heart leaps. I park the car in the nearby bus layby and jump out. I check the body - it is Moko. Her head is squashed, she has blood dripping from her mouth, and she is stiff. I drive back to the house, and tell Tosha that Moko has killed herself due to depression. Tosha gives me a blanket to go and collect our furry baby, and bring her back home for a burial. I bring back the body, and lay it in the conservatory. Tosha comes to say goodbye, and spends a few minutes petting poor dead Moko.
After tears have been shed, I suggest that we should bury the body. Tosha (who has read a long article about how cats grieve), suggest that we should let Bam see the body, so that he can recover more quickly from the loss. So, I go out into the garden, and call for Bam. Nothing. I call again. Nothing. Finally, I hear a scuffling in from a tree, and a friendly meow, and out jumps….Moko!
So, it turned out, Tosha had spent five minutes petting someone else's dead cat, that just happens to be a Moko's doppelganger. I'm not sure what we'll be doing with it, but if you're interested, check out eBay later on today…
WASHINGTON, September 07 /PRNewswire/ — In the wake of the cleanup operation in New Orleans, George W Bush has declared a war on hurricanes and other extreme environmental conditions. “We will defend the rights of the Merican people to fine weather, and will seek out extremist weather systems which aim to destroy liberty and the Merican way of life”, he said in a White House press conference this morning. Mr Bush went on to make clear that he was not attacking Islam : “Whilst there is a small minority of unclement days in the Arab world, Islam is a honourable religion that enjoys a nice sunny day as much as the rest of us, perhaps with a refreshing cooling breeze” he said.
The Pentagon has advised that troops are currently being removed from Iraq, and are being redeployed to the mid Atlantic, which is currently believed to be a breeding ground for unpleasant atmospheric conditions. “Hurricanes are part of an Axis of Unpatriotic Meteorological Occurences, along with other extreme weather such as tornadoes, typhoons, humidity, light drizzle in the afternoon, and sleet, which we will seek out and destroy. Our resolve is steely and our resolution is strong. We will make no distinction between bad weather and those countries which harbour bad weather”. Tony Blair, the Prime Minister of Great Britain was unavailable for comment.
Last weekend, whilst in the car, Tosha grabbed my phone and made a short movie. I know she is very proud of her movie-making skills, so she won't mind her short film getting a larger audience. Who knows - you may be seeing this at Cannes next year.