nik newark

Bet! Bet! Bet!

Forget the Grand National. Forget the Football. Forget any short term sporting nonsense. You should be thinking about betting on eventualities that may or may not happen in the distant future, and you should be placing your bets at http://www.longbets.org/. Longbets appears to be connected with the Long Now foundation, whose purposes are to get people thinking on a long term basis.

It works like this : for $50, you can make a prediction (e.g. by the year 2050 (or 02050, as Long Now people would say, to avoid the year 10K problem) there will no longer be naturally occuring grassland in the UK), and make your argument for it. If someone disagrees with your prediction, they can take you up on a bet - each participant then argues their own side of the debate (and puts up a sum of money, which goes into a low risk investment fund). Come 2050 (or whenever), the winner is decided, and the money goes to the charity of the winner's choice. As an example of “long now thinking”, it is best to specify your charity of choice beforehand, as it is likely that you may expire before your bet does.

More seriously, there are a number of problems which demand Long Now thinking. For example, the Bush Administration are quite keen on storing nuclear waste in Yucca Mountain. The trouble is, that this will remain highly radioactive for many thousands of years. Even assuming that we don't wipe ourselves out over the next 100 years, what is the appropriate way to signal to any cultures / beings in 10,000 years time that perhaps they ought to avoid Yucca Mountain?

One of the original projects of the Long Now foundation is the Clock of the Long Now. This is a clock that is designed to still be operating in 10,000 years time. You can see a picture of the design below. Part of the plan is to design something that needs minimal maintenance, and any maintenance that is required doesn't demand any specific technology, or technical knowledge. Perhaps it could even be maintained by, say, a monkey from Crawford.

God's Banana

It has often been said that the eye is a machine of such bewildering complexity, such staggering unlikelihood, that it proves the existence of a creator. Advocates of such a view point out that, unlike legs, where little short stubby legs are still better than no legs at all, any evolutionary steps towards a full eye (e.g. an eye without a retina, or without a properly developed optic nerve) would serve no purpose - you either need the entire eye and surrounding apparatus before it becomes worthwhile.

Being a confirmed aestheticist, I have little time for such nonsense, but I did have time to eat a banana this afternoon, and it got me thinking. If creationists had picked upon the banana as a proof that God exists, then they'd really be onto something. It is the perfect fruit. It is sweet, delicious, soft, biodegradably wrapped (and doesn't require washing), easy to peel, yellow (the worlds most cheerful colour), contains a repeated subexpression (see also bananananananana), it is the shape of a smile (a true friendly fruit), and exactly the right size to be a healthy and yummy snack in the mid afternoon. If it had been invented by a human being, it would have won many design awards : compare it to, say, the Pineapple (impossible to eat, unless you have a knife), the Orange (full of stupid seeds), the Kiwi Fruit (has fur), the Pear (is either rock hard, or is rotten), the Apple (has Intel Inside), the Coconut (impossible to drink the milk without having a drill to hand), the Peach (guaranteed to get you messy, and stain your clothing), the Sharon fruit (stupid name), or the Pomegranate (is just plain crap) - the banana is clearly superior in every way. No wonder everyone is going bananas over bananas! So, step forward, O mighty Jehovah, inventor of the Banana, and claim your prize (and explain what you were thinking of when you invented the fig).

Prediction

Some time in the next 48 hours, Tosha will use a variant on the phrase “headless mutilated rabbit” and “eaten by the norty kitties” on www.kittenhead.co.uk. I have a strong feeling about this one…

Is this real?

Currently selling some goodies in the Sound on Sound Reader's Ads, and received the following inquiry:-

I found by chance your and I am interested to buy it.Please, with kindness, let know the last price to me as well as the present Roman of condition the payment will be distinguished to you by a cheque .I will await your answer as soon as possible.

It appears that I've been approached by at automated sentence generator…